Bon Halloween!

Bonjour mes cheres ghosts, ghouls, goblins, and germans,

As you may have guessed, these four characters above are the scariest things to a Frenchman like myself. Indeed, we Frenchmen do not celebrate Halloween, as we prefer to not dress like monsters, but rather find them in the the duality of man. Plus the government would totally subsidize trick-or-treat candy and I am just not sure I could not in good conscious give out that much Toblerone.

Anyway, as my intern Ben Grinspan prepares our site's next thrilling post, here are some jolie Washington DC-themed Halloween costume ideas to keep you amused until then.

1. Death Panel

Get a bunch of friends together, dress as Marx, Lenin, Mao, Obama or any other famous pinkos and have them send Granny to the great workers' paradise in the sky

2. Birthers

I'm gonna say you should dress up like a baby and hand out racially tinged literature on Article 1, Section 2 of the Constitution. Because really dressing like a racist toddler can not possibly be more embarrassing than being an actual Birther.

3. Town Hall Member

First place, I wouldn't try this outfit unless you are white. So if you are, dress up like a 70 year old and then gain 100 pounds. This Halloween costume works best if you have a party to attend on Capitol Hill or perhaps the National Mall, that way your ranting about how brown people are scary can get you on Fox News!

4. The Public Option

Dress like a slutty doctor. Done. 

She's the public option baby- everyone's been insured by her!

5. Capitol Hill Intern

Hey Mom and Dad didn't max out on their donations to the DNC for nothing! Grab your Blackberry and your most poorly fitting business suit and count down the hours until you go to law school or move to New York.

Finally...CONGRESSIONAL ZOMBIES!

Are the living? Are they dead? Did they get re-elected for a 15th time or are they merely return from the grave to vote on non-binding resolutions honoring the American Tulip industry? Who cares! Just get some creepy make-up and see let the Huffington Post come to you.

Bon Halloween, y'all!