Are DC Killer Police Robot Tricycles Cool?

Historical eras tend assume the title of their most important technology: think of the Bronze age, the Iron age, the Industrial revolution and the Nuclear age. Ask any historian nowadays and they’ll tell you we live in the Segway age. When was the last time you saw someone using their “feet” or a “car” to get somewhere? No, we are the Segway generation because it’s what has truly separated us from the animals: obviously it's not so much our mastery of industry and electronics part, but the fact that many higher forms of intelligence (dogs, cats, whales) can feel shame, yet we as humans have accepted how completely stupid we look on Segways and have simply moved on.

This is why I think the T-3 is so exciting. Pictured above, this new police caliber Segway-type vehicle is the thin blue line separating the Washington DC area between civilization and chaos. Built to keep thieves from breaking into cars at suburban metro stations, the T-3 is the new parking lot Panzer tank. I even saw one the other day at Union Station, warding off potential criminals with its threatening yet modern design that's reminiscent of an angry salt shaker.

And remember this isn’t just a single use technology, there are all kinds of things the DC police department could do with such a handsome three wheeled killing machine. What if you need to reach products at the top of the grocery aisle or the library stacks at 20 mph? Or maybe the DC government, who probably barely has the money to cover the cost of the new T3s, could make money by organizing some sort of Roman style chariot race, where police officers hurl spears at each other as Marion Barry, Arianna Huffington or George Stephanopoulos give the thumbs down to the roars of a crowd of blood thirsty but Segway loving spectators? The possibilities are endless!

So I am going to give the T3 a big fat “cool” seal of approval, because Robocop ain’t got shit on this.